When you feel alone it can distort perception leaving you in the dumps, but the truth is you’re never really alone. Being by yourself or in a crowd is irrelevant to this feeling. It is often the result of seeming to have been left “alone” emotionally in relationships, especially ones that went from warm to lukewarm or cool; or the result of standing alone in certain viewpoints whether or not you arrived there with a friend who since deserted you to them.
But in all these trials and more, you really aren’t alone. Your Heavenly Father, who knit you together fearfully and wonderfully and knows the number of hairs on your head (Luke 12:7), is there for you. He says that if you are walking in obedience to Him, you are His friend and that He actually calls you “Friend“. There cannot be a truer friend. He delights in you and will keep you as the apple of His eye. As you worship Him, He lifts you up. He will never tire of pursuing you, guiding you and working all things out for good for you. He promises to be with you always, that He will never leave or forsake you, and that when your heart is broken He will be close to you and heal you (Matt. 28:20, Ps. 27:10, Josh. 1:5, Ps. 147:3, Ps. 34:17-18). I love the old hymn “What a Friend we Have in Jesus”. Here’s just a snippet of those lyrics:
Do your friends despise, forsake you?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield you;
you will find a solace there.
Because God knows you also need friends “with skin on them”, and sometimes need friends outside your family, He will guide you into friendships that will be mutually good for comfort, empathy and sharpening. And when you know the blessing of friendship, then by all means love earnestly, humbly and selflessly because this will cover for many mistakes. (1 Pet. 4:8-10, Phil 2:3-4) A wonderful place for Christian women to connect with like minded friends is the (In)Courage online groups. Registration for new group sessions happens to be going on this week. If you’re interested check out the link and find the custom fit group for you from over fifty choices.
In his book “The Four Loves”, C.S. Lewis says, ‘Alone among unsympathetic companions, I hold certain views and standards timidly, half ashamed to avow them and half doubtful if they can after all be right. Put me back among my Friends and in half an hour – in ten minutes – these same views and standards become once more indisputable. The opinion of this little circle, while I am in it, outweighs that of a thousand outsiders; as Friendship strengthens. It will do this even when my Friends are far away.’
Remember the childhood song, “Make new friends but keep the old. One is silver and the other is gold.”? So first revel in the faithful, ironclad friendship of the Lover of Your Soul. Then, do that gutsy thing and step out in fresh friendship with both the silver and the gold. You are loved with a devoted, victorious love that went all the way to the cross for you, and you are never alone.